Lameness.
It's oozing out of my pores. I have about a million stories for you but somehow have had zero time to write. Which means you suffer. And I remain lame, a lame-ass girl lamely working her lame self to death, occasionally making it back to her lame house to lamely go straight to bed, where I drift off to restless sleep while wallowing in my lameness.
Apologies.
In the meantime, I need you to do me a favor and recall the single most embarrassing experience you ever had attempting to pick up or hit on a member of the opposite sex. It is important that you are prepared with stories of your own failure, as I am about to share some incredibly lame tales of my own (and my friends', too, though they don't know it yet)... and we will all need the support.
Deal?
Thanks.
Oh, and happy Valentine's Day. Laaaammmmeee.
(Just kidding, I got flowers and presents already, suckers.)
(And for once I'm not going to tell you whether that is the truth or a big fat exaggeration... you'll just have to wonder. Good day.)
4 comments:
Oh Liz, have I got some stories for you, which I'll gladly share with you, luckily none of them involve me. Strange how I'll share those ones and not ones with me in them huh?
Man, avoiding doing things that I'm supposed to do is just getting harder and harder. It's tough work being a procrastinator you know?
Your bro,
Nick
Last birthday, I got pretty drunk and wandered around the bar asking ladies if they blogged and if so, what about?
It was pretty funny.
I'll tell one of mine AFTER I see yours and IF yours is MUCH more embarrassing. I'm just a B like that sometimes.
You are all so generous! I promise, though, that my humiliation cannot be beaten. Now I can't wait to tell it, though, because Jali's will be good (though, i repeat, not as good as mine).
The other day, Nick, I said to a co-worker "You know, prostitution isn't all bad!", meaning "Procrastination isn't all bad". Major freudian slip, that. He about died on the spot.
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